Take a Break

It's essential to have "me-time". Taking time for yourself is not a luxury (it's a necessity!), and it's certainly not selfish. It is key to leading a harmonious life. When you constantly give of yourself to others, you drain your energy. (I'm sure you've felt that before.) That's why it's so important to take time, every day, to literally recharge your batteries.

Take a few minutes each day to sit in a comfortable, quiet location and take deep breaths. Start with just 2 minutes a day and add a few minutes each week ,with your goal being at least 10 minutes a day. Sit with eyes closed, and breath slowly in through your nose, out through your mouth. Almost instantly you should begin to feel more relaxed and calm. You'll also notice your heart rate slow to a steady pace. Focus on your breath, and attempt to keep all nagging thoughts out of your head. If you find yourself worrying or dwelling, replace that thought with a peaceful image, like a quiet beach with rolling waves, a peaceful garden, or a favorite relaxing vacation spot.

Without a few moments to re-center yourself, you are more susceptible to stress, have a shorter temper, and often feel overwhelmed. By allowing yourself these few essentials moments, you'll greatly improve your overall quality of life. I'm certain that your family and friends will not even notice the bit of time you give to yourself, they'll only notice that you're more grounded and patient.

If you really want to enhance your "me-time", think about creating a "me-time" space that nurtures you during your moments of relaxation. Choose a quiet spot - your favorite chair, the foot of your bed, or even a nook in your bathroom or closet. Think about your senses, and keep things nearby that would augment your space - choose a candle with a fresh, calming scent to light while you sit, get a CD player (or your ipod) ready with soothing music, or place a journal nearby to write down thoughts before or after your minutes of "meditation".

Give to yourself first. It will make you a better wife, mother and friend.

For more information about Cailen Ascher Design or my upcoming book, Well-Designed Living, visit www.CailenAscher.bravehost.com or email CailenAscher@gmail.com.

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New Year, New You

Happy New Year! I can't believe that Christmas and New Year's Eve are already behind us, and the New Year has officially begun. 2008 was a particularly challenging year for many, and I'm sure many of you are looking forward to a fresh start and more prosperous times this coming year. That being said, I wanted to share with you some of my personal goals for this year in hopes of inspiring you to reflect upon your own or create some resolutions if you have not already done so.

Though I firmly believe that you can (and should) set goals throughout the year to continually challenge and improve yourself, the New Year is a wonderful time to lay out some aspirations for the next 12 months. But first, before you make a whole list of new resolutions, take some time to look back over the last year and reflect upon how you did with last year's goals. Did you meet your expectations? Surpass them? Forget them?

As for me, one of my personal goals was to lay the initial ground work for my business, Cailen Ascher Design, advertise, and get clients. I'm proud to say that I was able to reach all of these, and it feels great. Fulfilling a goal is very gratifying and a wonderful way to motivate you to keep on improving yourself, your business, your relationship, etc. At the beginning of 2008, I also vowed to incorporate more strength training into my workouts. This resolution I was also able to accomplish, and I now strength train twice a week and have experienced some great results from my commitment to this.

It feels great to look back and have a sense of accomplishment. The key is to set goals that are ambitious but not outrageous, challenging but not "painful". If you're looking at your 2008 resolutions and realizing that you did not meet them as you would have liked, don't just roll them over and make them your resolutions again for this year. If they didn't work for you then, they probably won't work now. Take the time to really brainstorm and prioritize. Make a list, share it with friends and family. Refine and revise it. If you really want to stick to your goals for this year, you have to create goals that excite you, inspire you, and perhaps even scare you a little bit.

For this year, I want to continue to build my business and seek out more, unique advertising venues. I'm going to set aside time over the next few days to evaluate my desired income for 2009 and then work backwards from there to establish how many clients I wish to have and how much I hope to average on each design job. When creating goals, it's really important to think them through and do your research so that you make informed resolutions that are well-designed for you.

As for my wellness goal, I've vowed to work with my mom and my dad on lifestyle designs, another aspect of my business, and follow "The Flat Belly Diet". This diet, created by Prevention Magazine, is based on the incorporation of monounsaturated fatty acids (MUFA) into your diet. MUFA decrease visceral fat between organs which lowers your risk for heart disease, cancer, diabetes, and decreases blood pressure. The eating recommendations sound very interesting (and delicious...nuts & seeds, olives, healthy oils, avocado, and dark chocolate all contain MUFA!!!). It seems like a great way to remake your nutrition regimen, improve your health, and feel and look better.

When creating your resolutions be positive. Wanting to lose 20 pounds because you look "fat and disgusting" might motivate you for a week or two, but your steam will quickly run out. Even if you feel frustrated with your current reality, stay focused on the future. If you want to lose 20 pounds, make your motivation something positive - to feel healthier, live longer, gain self-confidence, but whatever it is, be kind to yourself. If you want your resolutions to stick, you have to work with yourself, not against. Once you've selected your chosen resolutions, write them down and pick a start day, preferably at least 3 days away. Give yourself time to look forward to beginning your new lifestyle and then when you do begin, you'll do so with enthusiasm that will carry you through.

Keep your resolutions handy and reread them when you feel you're losing focus. I would also recommend journaling throughout the year to keep yourself committed to change!

Good luck and Happy New Year!

For more information about Cailen Ascher Design or my upcoming book, Well-Designed Living, visit www.CailenAscher.bravehost.com or email CailenAscher@gmail.com.

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Merry Christmas!

Christmas is such a wonderfully magical time. Even though I'm far too old to believe in Santa, I still do cherish Christmas time and Christmas spirit. I love readying the house for the holidays, baking Christmas cookies, planning seasonal gatherings, and watching as many Christmas specials as humanly possible.

This time of year really does bring out the best in people. People are friendlier, more considerate, and more forgiving. As you progress through the holidays this year, be present in every moment and truly savor it. This special time comes only once a year - it's not worth wasting it with worried thoughts and stress.

I wish you the merriest of Christmases and a very happy and prosperous New Year!
Cailen A. Poles.

The Good, The Bad, & The Ugly

Ever since childhood, we are told by friends, family, and the media that there are "good" foods and "bad" foods. We're told "don't eat that...that's bad for you!" But unfortunately, everyone's good intentions turn us into a food-fearing culture. Diets put food in strict categories: healthy, unhealthy, good, bad, fatty, low-cal, light, fat-free, diet...the list goes on and on. But, as you may have realized by now, life is never that black and white. That's why it's so important to cultivate a healthy relationship with ALL foods. Yes, that's right....All foods.

Labeling food is dangerous because it puts too many restrictions on living. As you may have realized, when you have too many rules for yourself and consistently deprive your body, you usually wind up overeating and therefore feeling fat, ugly, and like a failure (not a great place to be when you're trying to maintain a balanced, healthy life). But cookies, cake, chocolate, cheese, cocktails, and carbs (and all other "bad" foods) can be incorporated into even the healthiest of nutrition regimens. The key is moderation. If you allow yourself small indulgences, you're much less likely to go completely overboard because you've limited yourself too much.

If you work towards listening to your authentic stomach hunger (not irrational cravings) and feed yourself what you truly desire, you're much less likely to feel like the victim of a strict, unrealistic diet. Depriving yourself sets you up for failure. It's human nature to crave what you "cannot" have. So, if you decide that you're going to give up sweets in an attempt to be "healthier", you'll probably find that you begin to crave sweets even more!

With the New Year approaching, many people are probably brainstorming what resolutions they wish to make for 2009. Instead of making your resolution to "lose 20 pounds" or "drop 2 dress sizes", consider striving for a healthier relationship with food and your body. If you attempt to cultivate an understanding of your body and its needs, instead of restricting and punishing it, your quality of life will greatly increase, and I can almost guarantee your pants size will decrease!
Happy New Year!

For more information about Cailen Ascher Design or my upcoming book, Well-Designed Living, visit www.CailenAscher.bravehost.com or email CailenAscher@gmail.com.

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